Sunday, January 30, 2005

I tookn't any pills, i swear......

i was in the backyard of an unknown residence, sitting at one of those glass, picnic tables with the umbrella in the middle. I held an empty water glass, and decided to go inside for some more. I slid open the glass door and stepped into a kitchen i've never experience before. i saw kenny at a table, playing on a computer. I asked him to come outside and talk with me for a bit, and he said he was working. So i returned back outside and just looked around the backyard. I saw alot of those generic pothos-type plants hanging from the rafters of the wooden canopy. It looked nice. I saw kenny come outside and i asked him what took so long, and he replied that he had some important work to do. Suddenly, I was in the middle of a rant about my ideas for the revolution. It was not a political rant, but a spiritual one. During the highlight of my emotional spree, I suddenly lost my train of thought and began to become discombobulated. I grew dizzy and tunnel-visioned, and i looked to kenny who was sitting there, with an expression of suspicion. I tried to tell him that i was not under the influence of any substances, whatsoever. I tried to tell him that i was about to die, if not pass out on the floor. I felt very uneasy and leaned on the glass, it was not transparent and that made me feel sicker. I felt something spilling out from my mouth, and it made my eyes water. I was afraid of losing consciousness, though not fearful of death. I was trying to speak to kenny, to tell him that i did not cause this, that this is not a reaction, but an action. Those were the words i tried to transmit. But instead, all i could communicate, came in the form of a brown, muddy mass falling in clumps. Like wet cement, like the result of hours of constipation, like verbal diarhea. I then fell to the floor, and hoped, during the fall that this wouldn't be confused for anything self-inflicted. I wondered if i was poisoned, and i wondered if it was Kenny.
I awoke, very suddenly, very frightened, wondering if maybe was really physically wrong with me. After a few minutes of nothing, i rose for some sink water cupped in my hands and a splash to my face. I went back to sleep, it wasn't hard.

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